Doing 180's
Saturday
December
21, 2013
My
co-workers in the office where I have been for the last six (!) months were in
a jolly mood this week.
Friday
gifts were exchanged—I didn’t know the protocol—and I received some lovely
gifts…didn’t have anything to give. (Bad Form Caroline)
I
must relate that I have been feeling rather ill-used lately; or completely
unnecessary because of the menial work that has been delegated to me.
I am
now a very overpaid filing clerk.
A
co-worker, an R. N. who is recovering from an injury, was doing the same chart
busywork. I had not taken the time to get to know her over the last months, not
out of any negative feeling toward her, just feeling sorry for myself; too busy
licking my wounds to notice any one else.
We
were both gimping along with our canes--I have no idea what is wrong with my L
leg, but walking has become a challenge—and I made some kind of stupid remark
about two gimps that made her chuckle.
We
started to talk.
I lie like a
rug; I started pummeling her with questions.
I am
so nosy when bored…
You just don’t know what
others are all about sometimes. Frequently.
This
woman, I eventually find out, has a Doctorate
in Education.
Did I
feel stupid? I was feeling so
ill-used with my BSN going to waste?
Oy
vey.
She
must have had a good sardonic laugh at my expense. Fine. I love to make people
laugh.
I saw
myself from her eyes…my own personal camera obscura.
Like
peering into a rippling pool at my reflection—the same yet completely opposite,
constantly changing and obscured by my own narrow, blind, unaware image of
myself.
All
right if I must—A 180.
The
camera obscura was the first kind of camera.
Per
Wickipedia:
The camera obscura is an optical devise that projects an image of its
surroundings on a screen….The device consists of a box or room with a hole in
one side. Light from an external scene passes through the hole and strikes a
surface inside, where it is reproduced, rotated 180° (thus upside down), but
with color and perspective preserved.
Interesting.
After
a day of jumping into the horror of shopping at this time of year, I must say
that the light of Christ isn’t shining through many of us.
We
have an upside down picture of what the season of Christmas is all about. The
beautiful, priceless gem of the gift of Jesus is obscured by the layers of
Santa, elves, the “magic of Christmas” (don’t know what that means), material
hunger; it’s like the ugly snow banks along the side of a road well traveled.
After the pristine, white covering it becomes gray and dirty, riddled with mud
and salt180° from where it began.
Gotta
say that those of different faiths sure don’t lord their beliefs over the
world….their Holy Days have remained Holy Days. I truly admire that.
I
don't recall a mad sprint over trampled bodies to get that special sale price
on that (whatever) during Ramadon or Rosh Hashanah.
I am
sort of withdrawing from the commercial aspect of Christmas, at least this
year. I would like the light of Christ to shine through me, but have to get
myself out of the way first.
We
have had a lot of experiences this year that have shown us what matters and the
insanity that obscures, that turns us upside down, whirling and tumbling to empty
material nothingness.
I
want a Holy Day…not a holly, jolly one.
So in
my favorite way of being politically incorrect, I hope you all have a very
Merry Christmas. I truly do. I don’t “wish” it for you. I hope for you and for
all of us.
Until
next…
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